Dobo:  Anyone, anyone got ears on? My battery's down ta two little lights.

Teo:  Bars, Dobo, they're called bars.

Dobo:  Ok, well, it's down ta two little whatevers.

Teo:  K. Should last the shift if you go light on the talk button.

Dobo:  I'm not worried ‘bout it, just pointin’ out we're goin’ through batteries fast….You still readin’ me, Teo?

Teo:  Yeah...Nothing to add. 

Dobo:  ‘S Gonna be real quiet when they're gone.

Coop:  Least we won't hafta listen to you two yap all day.

Teo:  Hey, Coop.  We'll send smoke signals.

Dobo:  Ya lost me, Teo.

Coop:  Make a fire, heap some wet leaves on it so it smokes up good. Either ‘a you find anything worth salvage yet?

Dobo: That's just stupid, Coop sorry for sayin’ so.  No, nothin’ worth nothin.’ This whole town's been picked clean or burned out.

Coop: Joking, Dobo.  Two days to get here, just another desert.

Dobo: No batteries, Coop. It ain't funny. ‘S gonna be real quiet, like, forever.  Ya know, it's already stupid quiet all the time. There's nothin’ moves out here, anymore. ‘Less the wind’s blowing, or somethin’.

Coop: Save your battery. Handy will figure it out.

Dobo: Rechargeables don' last. An’ Handy can't make ‘em from scratch. Tellin’ ya. Was all over the place when I was a kid. Now them old store shelves is bare.

Coop: Everything's bare. We're halfway to Penna, Tank. There's nothin’ for us here anymore.

Tank: You three dumb asses don't know for shit.  Handy’s already got one built, and a lot of other stuff’s in the works.

Coop: Don't paint me with that brush, Tank, I already told ‘em to shut up.

Dobo: Whut? That proto thing weighs ten pounds and ya gotta carry with gloves an’ goggles?  I'm not draggin' that around on my back so acid can cook my skin off.

Mick: Prototype, then manufacture, then miniaturize.

Dobo: Hey, Mick. Yeah, I know miniaturization, I'm almost 30.  Teo oughta remember that sometimes.

Mick: Then you should know better.  You're not freaking on us, Dobo, are ya?

Dobo: Shut up. I'm not freakin’. I'm just sayin’.

Coop: Huh.  Hey, Tank, you remember granola bars? Found a pile a wrappers here.

Tank: Vaguely. Never ate ‘em. Fresh?

Coop: Negative. Kinda ironic they ain't biodegradable.

Dobo: What're those? 

Teo: Hell, yes, I remember those! And protein bars, and energy bars, and chocolate bars…

Dobo: Hah, Teo, I should’a guessed Teo would know all about bars!

Teo: You'd still be too young get in, moron.  

Coop: I think I found coffee.

Mick: You are joking, Coop.

Coop: No, I'm serious. Little brown beans.

Dobo: They're prolly dried pinto beans, haha!

Coop: Nope. They're coffee beans. They don't smell like much of anything anymore. But they were in a can…. You know...I think I've been here before.

Mick: Not possible, this is our first sweep out here.

Teo: Don't forget Coop used to be on another team.

Coop: Yeah, Cap’n Keyes’.

Dobo: Aww, crap, this isn't where...?

Coop: Nah, Dobo, not here.  I was here maybe six, seven years ago. That happened, oh, coming on four years now.

Mick: So that's how long it's been since I had a real haircut.

Dobo: Wha's matter, Mick, you gettin’ tired of the Tank Classic?

Mick: Well. Since the clippers died, only options are buzz cut or ponytail.

Teo: What I'm still in shock about is how Coop missed the coffee first time around.

Coop: Hah! Shut up, Teo. Would'a tasted better then, right?

Teo: Eh. No better'n dust, even then.

Dobo: Way you old timers talk about coffee, you'd think it was gasoline.

Coop: That and more, my young friend. I'll bet you remember pop?

Dobo: Yeah, sure, but I didn' get it much before. My parents told me it wasn't any good for me.  Turns out that was a lie.  I prolly drank ten stores dry the first year!

Mick: That's a lotta pop.

Teo: It's properly called soda, Mick.

Coop: Whatever, Teo. You startin’ to sound like what's ‘is name, Plato.

Teo: Who do you mean, that guy Larry?

Mick: Naw, wasn't Larry. It was like Lerner or Larner.

Teo: Whatever, last intelligent man alive.

Mick: Hahaha! Last whacked out nut job. What on earth connected that synapse, Coop?

Dobo: Who's this Larry-Larner dude, anyway?

Coop: Dunno, Mick.  Before your time, Dobo.

Teo: Several years back when we had the truck, we used to go collecting up around Syracuse. It's a big place, but there was a lot of competition, and there were still a lot of guns, so we would travel in groups. Anyway, one day - hello!

Tank: What is it, Teo? Report!

Teo: False alarm. Found a hope chest, but everything inside is completely degraded. Anyway, where was I?

Coop: So we go into the public library, cause Teo heard some shoutin’. We're real quiet, come up to the second level overlooking this big space with tables.

Teo: The reading room.

Coop: Yeah. And there's this guy there, standing on a table, pulling books off a stack, reading things outta 'em and then laughing like crazy. Guy was ravin’ nuts!

Dobo: Like what was 'e sayin’?

Coop: Teo prob’ly remembers.

Teo: He had a ton of stuff. But the one thing I remember was he had picked up a copy of Fukuyama’s End of History, and he started reading paragraphs, then ripping the pages out and yelling things like, “Bet you didn't see this coming, moron!” Then he'd cackle and find another passage.

Coop: He went on like that for an hour, but thing was, there was lots of people come in from all kinds ‘a teams.  We all kept an eye on each other, but there was no fightin’.

Teo: We were too busy egging him on.

Tank: Still think the whole thing was a diversion. Wish you'd have radioed that in sooner, we could've found something good, maybe.

Mick: That was the last time we came together with others as a civilization.

Tank: You love that word, Mick.

Coop: He's right, though, Tank. Mick is right, ain't no more civili-za-tion.

Teo: Unless we make it.

Coop: You kids, maybe. Old guys like us… We just need to find someplace to retire. Ain’t that right Mick?

Mick: I'm with you, Old Man! Done with trudgin’ around the wasteland looking for scraps.

Teo: April is the cruelest month.

Dobo: Think it's more like September, Teo.

Teo: Talk about civilization. Think about everything we achieved, everything deep and beautiful, that’s gonna be lost. I get why Plato was hysterical.

Tank: We should never have stopped the lessons. We should start that up again.

Mick: Who we gonna teach, Tank? After Toby died, what was the point? No more kids. Maria’s too old, Haley can't have 'em. You wanna teach Dobo T.S. Eliot and show him pictures of the Sistine Chapel? What's he gonna do with that?

Tank: Given 5 minutes you lot go all apocalypse. Every time.

Mick: Jeeeeeeze, Tank.  What did you think the Apocalypse was gonna look like?

Tank: Maybe if you ladies talked less and looked more, you'd find something we could use and we could head back home. Where you at, Mick?

Mick: 7-11 downtown. It's bare. Looks like someone disassembled the shelving and took all the sheet metal. Brackets, too.  Most of the ceiling tiles are busted out. Cut out the piping for the fire sprinkler system and ripped out all the BX.

Coop: Commercial spaces are a waste of time.

Teo: Fair enough, but so are residential spaces.  All the plumbing has been cut out of this place, too, except for the PVC. That all melted in the fire.  I can't even get down to the basement to see if there's anything left to salvage.

Dobo: Where you at, Teo? I'll come help.

Teo: Not worth it, Dobo.  This whole structure is burnt out and rotted.  It would all come down on our heads.  I can see a bit in there, there's nothing recoverable.

Dobo: Awright. Got an ol’ engine block here from a tractor.  Pretty heavy though, an’ all rusted out. Looks like s’been stripped it bare.

Teo: Tank, I'm moving out towards the farms.  

Tank: Roger that, Teo.  You in grid B5 now?

Teo: Uhh…affirmative. Heading to B4, the ones we marked in the 40s.

Tank: Alright, good. Let's get an orientation reset. Mick, what's your grid? 

Mick: Still in A2, working my way West.

Coop: Coop here, I'm F1, moving north.

Tank: K. I'm F5, working East.  Dobo?

Dobo: About E4, I think, movin’ north.

Teo: Don't just think about it, Dobo! Look at your map!

Dobo: OK, fine, but I'm in brush up ta m’armpits, ain't that easy.

Teo: What the hell you doing out there?

Dobo: Tryin’ ta get north.

Tank: You gotta get some elevation, Dobo.  Remember that tower we saw last night? Gotta be an access road up there.  You're heading into lowlands, probably marsh if you just keep on your current line.

Dobo: Roger that, Tank. Headin’ up the slope.

...

Teo: Tank, anyone sweep this way before?

Tank: No Teo, not that I know of. Why?

Teo: Small pile of salvage out here. Looks recent.

Tank: Recent? Ok, everyone, stay sharp! Stop and look around you.  Teo, describe what you see.

Teo: I see a couple of boards, look like shelving, near the edge of a driveway. Wood is in good condition, like someone took it out of the house recently.  Not weathered, you know?

Tank: Ok, ok… Hasn't rained here in a while though, so could be a few days or more?  You see prints or other signs of salvagers?

Teo: Not out here, gonna walk up to the house. 

Coop: What about the rest of the salvage? Anything good?

Teo: Nah, nothin’ good.  Scrap.

Mick: There’s nothin’ worth salvaging out here anymore, Tank.  We should’a moved on years ago.

Tank: Knock it off, Mick, I heard you the first thousand times.

Tank: Teo, What's your position?

Teo: Hang on, I hear something...Maybe.

Tank: Hold your position, dammit! Follow protocol!

Teo: Sorry, Tank. Farm 41. Going quiet.

Tank: Son of a - Who's close?  Mick, Coop, can either of you get eyes on?

Mick: Mick, here. Negative. I'm in the valley.

Coop: Coop, here. I can be there in 5, if I take the road...

Tank: Do it. Dobo, get up the hill to that tower. See if you can get above the trees. You got your glasses?

Dobo: Yeah, got ‘em.  Gonna need five.

Mick: Then shut up and go, already. Tank, where you want me?

Tank: Just hold there until we get a report. 

Dobo: This is when I miss gasoline….If we were on ATV’s, I'd be there by now.

Mick: Gotta find some old cars, suck it out.

Coop: Nothin’ left a that, you know.  If there were... wouldn't be no damn good anyway...not after seventeen years.

Coop: Save your breath, Coop. Mick, you should sweep East, case they need support. I'm coming back West.

Coop: Almost there, boss….We should go back to the ethanol.

Mick: Handy says he can't make it work. Batteries are better.

Coop: Toothpaste, that's all I want. Just to find one, unopened tube.

Dobo: We got toothpaste.

Coop: Not real toothpaste.  That's just baking soda and mint.  I'm talking about Crest.  Or Colgate.

Mick: Toothpaste. Hell, what about a decent bar of soap? Good old Ivory, not that ash crap that never really rinses off.

Coop: What about one, single pair of new jeans? Or a pack of Hanes? Or one tiny scrap of cloth that ain't worn through or full a holes? 

Dobo: What happened to that plan of Lattie’s to make it?

Coop: Same as happened to all the plans.  Got the loom to run manual, but ran outta thread.  We can make the machines, but we can’t get the materials.

Tank: Alright, kill the nostalgic chatter.  Save your batteries and get to Teo! We might be dealing with another salvage party.

Teo: Hey, I’m back.  Was just a scag.

Coop: Horseshit! What the hell are you talking about?

Dobo: What? A scag? Really? You saw… a scag?  Did it see you?

Coop: There haven't been any scags for 16 years! Who did you see?

Teo: Yeah, it might have seen me, maybe two seconds before I shot it.

Tank: Did it make any noise?

Teo: Nah, just froze and I nailed it.  Already had the bow drawn.

Coop: What the hell, Teo? There are no “scags” out here. There aren't even birds!

Teo: Whatever, Coop.  It’s dead.

Coop: Was it a man or woman?

Teo: OK, here we go. It was a female.  I’m going back to my sweep.

Coop: Tank, this is bullshit! Teo just shot someone! First person we've seen in a decade! No way she was alone out here.

Tank: Everyone hold your position. Teo, get to cover.  Dobo, what do you see?

Dobo: Man, you can see for-ever up here….just goes on and on, don’ it?

Teo: You mean like your insipid comments, Dobo?

Dobo: Ooo, that’s a ten dollar word, Teo. Didn’t know you brang yer dictionary.  There’s some smoke signals, now.

Coop: How do you not know smoke signals? Where did you go to school, anyway?  You must’a made sixth grade.

Dobo: Seventh. Lexington. 

Teo: Oh, that ‘splains a lot!  A-ha-ha!

Tank: Cut the chatter! This is a serious situation.  Dobo, what are you seeing up there?

Dobo: Just a thin line of smoke, north over t’other side a’ the valley.

Tank: Big and black?

Dobo: Nah, thin, white. Like for cookin’ maybe?

Mick: Nothin’ down that way, is’ere, Coop?

Coop: Nah, nothing, no one.

Dobo: Maybe it's more scags, ya think? I can't see none though. Fire's gotta be over th’other side.

Mick: Whattaya thinking, Tank?

Tank: Coop, get off the road and hold your position. Mick, can you see anything from where you are?

Mick: Negative. I’m right in front of St. Mary M, starin’ up the hill.

Dobo: Hey Coops, can scags make fires?

Coop: What the hell, Dobo? Knock it off with the scags.

Dobo: Well, now...now  I kin see three...er, four I guess...movin’ down the hill toward...uh...I guess that’d be East of St. Mary M’s.  Steeple’s left of their line.

Mick: Tank, what the--t---eh-can’t--sh---

Tank: Mick, you’re breaking up, come again?

Mick: T--in---sh---v to--n--

Tank: Mick, get off the road.  Dobo, you got eyes on?  Where are those...people?

Dobo: Can’t see ‘em no more, Tank.  I kin see the steeple, but nothing lower, the trees are blockin.’

Coop: Tank, I’m going down there.  Hang on, Mick.

Tank: Negative, Coop.  Everyone hold on, let’s do this like we trained.  Switch to the alternate channel and move to RV 2.  Got it? Go to RV 2, and alternate channel in three...two...one.

Tank: This is Tank, sound off.

Teo: Teo.

Dobo: Dobo.

Coop: Coop.

Tank: Mick, you copy?  

Tank: I repeat, Mick, sound off?

Teo: This is Teo, I’m at RV 2, no one else here.

Tank: Teo, what was that...woman you shot wearin’?

Teo: Uh.  Some kinda jacket, I guess...all patched up.  That’s all I remember. 

Tank: Dobo, last line on that party of four...was that making for Farm 41?

Dobo: Uhhh, yeah, yeah, could a been.  I dunno. I'm moving to the RV, so I don't got eyes on no more….Hey, Dobo here.  Hey, I can’t get to RV 2.  Those scags, they’re out in the field at the farm. I gotta go the long way ‘round.

Tank: Roger that.  Hold your position, get some recon from there.

Dobo: OK, but, uh, I’m down to one light.  Bar.

Tank: How many of ‘em you see, Dobo?

Dobo: Three, I think.  Outside anyway.  I think one might a’ gone inside.

Tank: Coop, what’s your position?

Coop: I’m on the ridge path, about ten minutes from RV.

Tank: OK, scratch that, head straight down to the edge of the field.  See if you can get eyes on these guys.  Teo, you need to stay out of sight.  Get under cover and stay there.

Teo: Shit, Tank!  What’r we gonna do?

Tank: Keep it together, Teo.  Get up on the ridge, stay quiet.

Coop: You should ditch the bow, Teo.

Dobo: Why would he ditch the bow?  These guys looks like they got guns. I’d keep it.

Tank: Coop’s right, lose the bow. What kind of guns, Dobo?  How many?

Dobo: Why should he lose the bow, Tank?  I dunno, like rifles, like Handy’s.  I see three of em. They carryin’ that scag outta the house.

Coop: All of you shut up with the scag talk, willya?  There Are. No. Scags! That’s a loada bull, it's just people.  Keep your finger off the talk button, dammit.  Tank, we gotta pull back.  Mick’s still missing, Teo’s out, we’re gonna lose radio with Dobo.

Tank: Coop’s right.  Dobo, get back to the ridge trail.  Meet up behind St. Mary M.  Run silent unless you’re in trouble.  Get there in 20.  Don’t get caught. Go.

Teo: Tank, you gotta call it in.

Tank: Not yet, let's find Mick.

Teo: They have guns.  We've got machetes and a bow we can't use.  What're we doin’ if we meet up with 'em?

Dobo: Yeah, what am I supposed to do… If one of 'ems on the trail…

Teo: I dunno, welcome him to Breesport. Jeez, Dobo, didn't Coop tell you to keep your finger off the damn talk button?

Dobo: Why you always insulting me, Teo? What am I s’posed to do if they don't speak American?  I don't know no Mexican or Chinese.

Tank: Run silent, dammit!  All a you!

…

Dobo: My radio’s almost gone….eet you a-

Tank: Roger that, Dobo.  If you're still receiving see you on the ridge trail.  Any contact?

Teo: Teo, here, negative. Coming up the hill now.

Coop: Coop here, negative. I'm on the trail heading south, five minutes out.

Tank: K. I've just reached the East edge of town. Holding here to recon.

Dobo: Anyone, anyone, I'm at St Mary M. No one here, but I found Mick's radio. He's got like four bars. What kinda batteries did he get?

Tank: Dobo! Where's Mick?!

Dobo: Dunno, radio was just sitting here on the ground.

Coop: That don't make sense, Dobo.  Tank, he mighta tossed it if someone grabbed him.

Teo: Would’a had to see ‘em coming, right? 

Coop: And why didn't they pick it up?

Tank: Unless it's bait.  Dobo, get outta there.  Head into town, go to ground.  I'm a half mile from the steeple. I'm coming to you.

Coop: Tank, where you want me?

Tank: Find Teo, stay there. Run quiet.

…

Dobo: I'm hid good under an old truck.  I can see three sets a legs. They're talking, just standing there.

Tank: Ok, keep quiet, coming to you.

Tank: Teo, Coop, report.

Coop: Coop here. No sign of Teo.  Been back and forth along the ridge a couple times. 

Tank: Teo, where you at?

Tank: Teo, report!

Dobo: Aww Tank, this is bad, this is way bad.  

Tank: Hold it together, Dobo. You still see people?

Dobo: Yeah, they ain't moved. I'm stuck here! Call it in, Tank! … Tank! What are you waiting for? All of us to get taken?

Coop: It’s 'cause there ain't no calling it in anymore, is'ere?

Tank: You don't know shit. Nothing. If I call it in, the cavalry comes.  But something's not right here.

Coop: Damn right something's not right! A lot’s not right! We're on our own out here! You're holding a post that no one's ever gonna relieve you from, ‘cause that world's gone, Tank! 

Tank: Don't get your panties in a knot, Coop.  I'll call it in.  Just want to get eyes on Dobo, see these guys. Coop, get off the trail.  Go super quiet, you hear?  I don't want you mistaken for one of them when I call it in. 

Coop: I'm already off the trail, and I'm not going to shut up, Tank.  There's real people out here, with guns and for all we know food.  Civilization, Tank! Not some mythical colonel whose gonna come back like Jesus!

Tank: Then why are they foraging in a burned out town in the middle of nowhere, Coop? You forget that quick what it was like back when we had the truck? I was here twice, a dozen years ago. Both times lost good people, once over a mattress and a couple of ratty blankets.  You want to go see if people got friendlier in the last decade?

Coop: Yeah, Tank. I do. ‘Cause Handy won't make another winter with what we've managed to scrape together, and I'm sick to death of potatoes and apples. And you might’ve shared some of that info with us mere conscripts.  I know you like to think you're the general and we're your private infantry, but in case you hadn't noticed we're not at war. We're starving.

Dobo: Well, if you're gonna call it in, better do it quick.  They're moving back to St Mary-

Tank: Dobo, repeat? Dobo, you there? Dobo?

Coop: Great. Now they picked up Dobo.  We should've greeted them, not shot the first person we've seen in ten years in the chest.

Tank: I'll come up to you, we need to plan. Just stay calm, Coop, keep your eyes and ears open.

Coop: Teo shot the bow, but you've been filling his head with stories about scags for years.  What we need to do is walk right down there and show them we're civilized, that it was an accident. Help Teo and Mick and Dobo.

Tank: Then what, Coop? Lead 'em back to the bunker to get Handy and girls?  How do you think that'll go?

Coop: Shit, Tank. I dunno.  There used to be more'n 50 of us.  Just 9 now.  We ain't making it on our own. I been cold and hungry as far back as I can remember.  I know I wasn't always, but I just don't remember.  If there really are less people, why the hell can't we find anything? How the hell can it all be gone?

Tank: Hold it together Coop. I'm coming. You're covering ground we've been over a thousand times. You're just freaking a bit, it's understandable.  Just keep the volume down and keep your eyes and ears open!

Coop: Maybe you are s'posed try and call it in… 

Tank: Yeah, I think I have to, just not sure what to say yet, what we're dealing with. I gotta have better intel before I make that call.

Coop: What if I go down, intercept 'em, lead everyone back to Syracuse.  You go get everyone, meet us there?

Tank: They're gonna ask questions, Coop. And we shouldn't be talking like this, there are radios missing.

Coop: Then just call it in. 

Tank: Coop! Coop, you hear that? That's an engine! I hear an engine! Coop, can you hear that?

Tank: Really faint, but definitely an engine.  You copying me, Coop? … Coop? Come back!

Tank: Coop, I'm coming to your last known, we'll call it in together!  Hold on, buddy!

…

Tank: This is Tank, calling anyone in ground team alpha with ears on. I’ve reconned every square foot of this ghost town, far south as I could.  Whatever happened to you, I can’t find a trace. If you are still able, get home any way you can.  I’m out of supplies.   I’ve got to reprovision.  I want to come back for you, but I’ve got to report in first.  Gonna call it in, we’re gonna come get you! 

…

Tank: This is Major Mark Grady, call sign Tank.  My support team is gone, presumed dead. I mark 72 hours since I called in an emergency evac with no response or reply.  Protocol says to fall back to the nearest active base, but I have had no response to general mayday.  I have no choice but to  abandon my post at forward staging base echo one seven. The small community that has helped me to secure this location for the past 15 years is gone, all without a trace.  We have never been able to enter the blast doors anyway, so there is no way for me to scuttle the stockpiles. I regret that I could not carry out my mission until relief.  I have recorded my final log and locked it in the watch safe with the last codes we were given. If anyone is looking, I'm headed south.

….

Tank: Anyone, anyone got ears on? Last battery, last bar, last frequency band. I crossed into New Jersey this morning.  I'm on the Garden State Parkway. My supplies are low. Haven't found anything to supplement me in days.  If there is anyone left… if you speak English, if you can understand… You know, we train, we train for situations, but it's been a long time since we saw civilization.  My battery's dying, and there's nothing out here, hasn't been for a long time.  I should've moved on a long time ago, looked for everyone else.  It's just that it gets stupid quiet when the wind isn't blowing.